As an estate planning attorney with years of experience, I can tell you that more than one client has struggled with this question. Should they leave the same amount of assets equally to each child? The answer is often simple, sometimes not so much. I found this article, published on Investopedia n 4/17/2025, to be a good overview of considerations related to this question. It was written by Beverly Bird. Read on if this is something on your mind, too.
“It depends on their circumstances and your concerns. The United States Census Bureau reported in 2024 that more than half of Americans ages 18 through 24 lived with their parents in 2022. It may be a reminder to parents that estate planning isn’t just about providing for minor children. Adult children may need financial support as well.
Some decisions might have to be made about who gets what and how much. Giving each child an identical share might not be the best or even the fairest approach for all families.
Key Takeaways
- An equal inheritance gives the same percentage share of your estate to each of your children.
- An equitable inheritance accounts for different circumstances and needs among your heirs.
- If you foresee squabbling among your heirs, there are several ways to make sure your wishes are followed.
- One way is to add a “no contest” clause” to your will.
Equal vs. Equitable Inheritances
Family inheritances can be divided into two categories: equal or equitable. “Equal is a simple mathematical determination,” says David I. Faust, a trusts and estates, tax, and asset protection attorney and partner at Gallet Dreyer & Berkey in New York. “Divide the estate by the number of children and distribute each share to each child outright net of whatever is left after debts, spousal bequests, and taxes.”
An equitable inheritance gives each child what their parents consider fair based on each family member’s circumstances. One child might receive significantly more or less than another.
When Equal Inheritance Makes Sense
“I would estimate that about 90% of parents leave their assets to their children in equal shares,” says Evan Farr, a certified elder law attorney with the Farr Law Firm in Virginia, DC, and Maryland. “Almost all parents do this because of perceived ‘fairness.'”
Equal inheritance can be easier to arrange for some estates than others, however. It’s a much simpler matter to divide $200,000 in cash into equal parts than to determine what physical assets such as property or stock shares might be worth at some unknown date in the future.
Important
Knowing the value of physical property can be crucial if an estate is to be passed on in equal shares if the intention is to divide the whole into equal parts.
How to Divide Assets Equally
If Child A inherits the family home valued at $300,000, Child B would be entitled to $300,000 in cash in an equal distribution. Another option would be for the two children to jointly inherit the house, sell it, and divide the proceeds.
The latter option can be tricky if the siblings have a contentious relationship. An evenly divided estate could be a better solution.
The main benefit of equal distribution is that it’s simple and could avoid ill will and hurt feelings between children.
When to Consider Unequal Inheritance
Several family circumstances can make an equitable or “fair” inheritance more reasonable. Faust gives several examples:
“One child has a highly successful, lucrative career. Another is a special ed teacher in a disadvantaged neighborhood, doing worthy work but at low pay. One child has actively participated in and contributed to the business, the family’s main source of wealth. The other child doesn’t participate in the business. One child may have special needs, physical or mental, or both, which preclude them from significant gainful employment and which will require extensive medical and related costs and support.”
Another consideration is that you may want to include someone in your estate plan who isn’t legally your child, such as a stepchild or godchild. Dividing your estate equally among your three biological children could leave the others out, particularly if your will becomes contested and your state’s intestacy laws come into play. These laws determine rightful, legal heirs when there’s no recognized valid will.
How to Avoid a Family Squabble
Deciding how you want your estate to be divided among your children is your first challenge. Implementing and protecting your decision can require additional planning.
“Most parents are worried that if they leave unequal amounts, their kids will fight and this is predictably accurate,” Farr warns. “Unequal distributions often do lead to family fights and prolonged and expensive litigation.”
A child who doesn’t agree with your choice to leave an equitable inheritance can contest the terms of your will. They might attempt to convince the court that you lacked the testamentary capacity to make the decision. They might allege that you didn’t understand what you were doing because of issues such as Alzheimer’s disease or another impairment.
They might claim that you were subject to undue influence, charging that the child who received a larger share of your estate somehow coerced you into the decision. You were manipulated and pressured.
You can take certain steps to ensure that your wishes are honored, however.
Include a No-Contest Clause
You can include a no-contest provision in your will stating that any bequest made to a contesting child becomes null and void if they attempt to have your will thrown out of court.
This generally requires leaving the likely contester at least enough of an inheritance that they have something to lose by challenging the will.
The exact processes for contesting a will can vary by state.
Consider Lifetime Gifting
You might consider passing on your estate, or at least the bulk of it, while you’re living.
You may qualify for the federal gift tax exclusion if you make incremental annual gifts that don’t exceed the qualifying limit: $19,000 per person per year as of 2025.
Create a Living Trust
You can transfer ownership of your assets into a living trust during your lifetime, citing the terms for who receives what and how much they will receive at the time of your death. Assets in a living trust bypass the probate process, so your property will pass to your heirs without court involvement.
Living trusts can be either revocable or irrevocable:
- You can undo a revocable trust and take back the assets you’ve placed into it if you change your mind. You would normally act as the trustee during your lifetime and manage the trust’s assets yourself. You would name a successor trustee to take over at the time of your death and disperse the assets to your beneficiaries according to your wishes.
- An irrevocable trust is carved in granite. You can’t change your mind after you’ve created it and you can’t control it as trustee. You must name someone else to assume this role. Irrevocable trusts avoid estate taxes, and their assets are immune to any claims by your creditors because you no longer own them after you transfer them into the trust.
The terms of a living trust can also cite an age at which you want your children to receive their inheritances rather than the statutory age of adulthood in your state.
Fast Fact
Establishing a trust can’t prevent an unhappy heir from contesting its terms but the legal process is more challenging than it is for a will.
Use Beneficiary Designations
Beneficiary designations allow you to name someone to inherit an asset without the necessity of a will or trust. You can title your home in joint names with one or more of your children with rights of survivorship. They’d automatically receive the property after your death without the need for a probate process.
Other beneficiary designations can include payable-on-death bank accounts and life insurance policies.
The Bottom Line
It’s your estate and your wishes should guide how it’s dispersed after your death. Estate laws vary between states, so it’s important that you consult with a legal professional in your area when you create your estate plan whether it’s contained in a will or you use another legal mechanism.”
I hope, if you are struggling with this issue, this article has been helpful to you. Please consider reaching out to me to discuss your will and estate plan. I’d be honored to work with you and ensure your estate plan meets your goals while protecting your assets and loved ones. Please call me at 513-399-7526 or visit my website at www.davidlefton.com for more information. You can schedule a meeting with me directly from my site.
Source: Investopedia 4/17/2025; written by Beverly Bird